let's stick together

ah drained from critisizing milton friedman--one should be careful though sometimes when you get too lost in critisizing you fail to produce anything new that is of worth. i have no life for now, too much crap to get done, including the thesis proposal. i am seriously f****d up though- i go from 'i can't take it i'm gonna crumble and die' to singing randomly to cheap pop songs staring outside the bus window, fully exposing my randomness to the passing vehicles, mostly joyful. i also noticed something very dangerous about myself, i forget my miseries when accompanied by others--now you may say where's the danger in that?--but it is not as lovely as it sounds, for you fail to struggle with the dark dark emotions and forget and smile and laugh and wear yourself out and then in a dark hour just as those feelings themselves when you're about the close your eyes or when you're in your room in a blank moment--they come prowling and you are alone and defenseless. listened to some old dylans today--dylan and zepp-the two seasonless gods--blasted all my upbeat zepps on my way to school as well--i fear that one day i may grow so old that i won't like music this much anymore--this life of force--what a waste that would be.